I saw a couple of great posts today that I thought you guys might find interesting aswell. I am also in the process of developing a reader submissions section for Reiki Blogger so you can send in questions or shout outs to some great Reiki or other personal growth bits and pieces you have found that you think other Reiki Blogger regulars might also like.

1. Timothy Ferris is the best-selling author of the 4-hour work week, and is a popular personal development/productivity writer. He has an interesting interview up this week on his blog with AJ Jacobs. AJ decided to conduct a bit of a social experiment by living according to Biblical guidelines (literally) for a year. And wrote a book about his year. (Literally, by the way, includes, but is not limited to: stoning adulterers, only wearing white..)
While the interview is a lot of fun, and light-hearted, I found some of his comments very interesting, like:

I saw how the outer affects the inner

and

I forced myself to stop gossiping, and eventually I started to have fewer petty thoughts to gossip about.

and

I forced myself to help the needy, and found myself becoming less self-absorbed.

2. RT is a good friend and a fellow buddhist. He has a great post with tips about how to eat more fruit. Which is cool and everything, because finding ways to eat better is always good (especially with all this talk about how the outer affects the inner..) but, the link love is mainly to try and entice him over (with a track-back) to Reiki Blogger to explain why he disagrees with my recent post on forgiveness. (which he was heard to say, recently, over a cup of Tea with Mr Reiki Blogger himself! ~cue scoff and eye rolls~)
I have always secretly hoped that no-one would really believe any of what I wrote here, rather that it would only ever act as a compliment or beginning of some more thorough or genuine insight.. So, here is hoping RT jumps into the fray on forgiveness..

Forgiveness is the most important skill you need to live a happy life.

Some may disagree and say it is compassion, or love, or some other sacred emotion. And they would be able to make a good case, and there would be alot of benefit merely in engaging the debate.

But, to me, it is forgiveness that is the most important one.

And, it is simply a matter of context and language. I believe that in our western context and the time which we are living, it is the language of forgiveness that is the most beneficial for helping us live a happy life.

The trick and the simplicity of happiness is that it is actually inherent within us. Our natural state is one of contented happiness. That is the core of every human being.

And, when we are not experiencing life in that way, it is a distortion. Like a cloud covering the sun. Or in some people’s case concrete.

So, what we actually need to learn is how to remain in our natural state. How, not to get carried away by our thoughts and emotions, and also how to come back to our natural state when we have.

And, the great thing is that we do not have to have a strong experience of primordial contentment before we can begin. Because, every time we let go of an emotion that has carried us along, the stronger becomes the cause for the natural state to remain, and the weaker the cause for the emotion to take us away.

And, here is the magic and power and essential aspect of forgiveness.

If we are expert in the art of forgiveness we will be able to skillfully let go of any situation, any hurt or happiness (in the pleasure sense like excitement, for example) that has carried us along, when we become aware that it has happened.

I am not saying not to have any emotion. Not to have strong feelings (sighs of reliefs from the artists). That would not be a natural way.

I am just saying, to follow a natural way more clearly, do not let yourself be carrying along by the emotion/feeling. Enjoy it, or be patient with it (in the case of grief or depression, say), but do it with an open hand. Just do not try and keep it going, or force it to end.

Forgiveness keeps the mental hand open, and flexible.

If you are approaching Reiki as a self development path, or better still as a support on your spiritual path, then one turn of phrase that you may have encountered a long the way is “self honesty”.

I really like self honesty. I think it is one of the most important supports for personal growth. But, I also think it is a tricky game to play.

When we think about the “self” in this context we are talking about the relative self. The little self. Or the ego. All meaning the same thing. And our normal self is something that has gotten pretty good at having things go pretty much all its own way. But, at the same time it is also the very best witness, because it is always there. We can never escape ourselves.

I was thinking about this, while sitting listening to one of my Buddhist teachers give a talk the other night. He was saying that for him, the best person to judge whether his practise is genuine is himself. Because he always sees himself, he is always there. Whether he is feeling happy or sad, acting polite or not, he is always there. He cannot hide from himself.

And, I think this is the really positive aspect of self awareness/self honesty. Because, we carry that witness always, we can use it to keep ourselves “honest”, so to speak.

The tricky thing is, as I said above, our ego has had such a great time up until now, pretty much having free reign over our decisions, that it is very good at “acting” like it is being raw and true. When in fact it is keeping some aspects back.

Which usually shows when we justify something to ourselves. Like having lost our temper (we were being righteous..) or skipped one too many daily self treatment sessions (I should only do it when it feels “sacred”..) or whatever..

Obviously, everyone is different. And the stories are going to be different. But, everyone should approach their feelings with a little bit of skepticism, because, self honesty is a perspective not so easily won.

We had a little bit of a problem with the domain registrar recently. And the site went down. I am happy to report we are back to normal, and everything is working nicely again.

I have a bunch of posts I have been working on that I will be posting soon. So, please check in again soon. Or better yet, subscribe to the feed to get the updates.

Hoping this finds you well, and your reiki practise and path treating you well.

TC

Welcome to the 99th carnival of healing. I hope you all enjoy this week’s carnival here at Reiki Blogger. As always we have a diverse range of submissions and plenty of great posts for you. Please have a look at last week’s carnival if you haven’t caught it yet, which was held at Spiral Visions.

And if you want to give yourself a real treat you could put on a pot of coffee and have a good look through the carnival archives. Lots of great stuff hiding away in there!

But, without further delay.. let’s head on into the big top and check out this week’s carnival..

First up, GP presents Lessons in Mental Management posted at Fish Creek House - INNside Innkeeping.. This is a very interesting post, and has some really good insight.. I really identify with the “getting in the zone” routine tip.. perhaps I am just OCD.. but I also wonder if this a good way to come at achieving the mindset that facilitates using the law of attraction to its full potential.. great post..

Vahid chaychi presents Use Cognitive Behavior Therapy to Build Self- Esteem posted at Healthoma.com. Changing the way we think.. sounds easy enough.. (yeah right!)

Lucynda Riley presents Swollen Lymph Nods in the groin posted at Quietly Into the Night. Some natural remedies here..

Aparna presents Beware of dust mites on your pillows posted at Beauty and Personality Grooming. I have always wondered about these little critters.. you hear about them.. but you never really know much about them.. until now.

Karen Halls presents Drug & Alcohol Addiction Treatment posted at Addiction Recovery Blog.

Millionaire Mommy Next Door reminds us that Memories are made of the things we DO, not the things we BUY posted at Millionaire Mommy Next Door.

Jody presents some more interesting natural remedies at The Trinity Project - Natural Cure-Alls posted from The Trinity Project.

Tupelo Kenyon presents Spiritually Thriving by Choice posted at Tupelo Kenyon. Nice long post, a lot of effort in this contribution, and a great story..

Warren Wong presents Make People Comfortable By Greeting Them Right posted at INTJ Personal Development. First thing I had to do when I visited Warren’s blog was look up what an INTJ personality person was like..

Marc and Angel step up with Here in the Real World: 20 Lessons for Life posted at Marc and Angel. This is a great blog. A down-to-earth post.. check out the archives for more great writing..

isabella mori presents getting through depression posted at change therapy. Another beautiful contribution from isabella, a carnie regular, written in her consistently clear and kind voice..

And lastly, Stephen Miracle presents Do You Have This Misconception of Forgiveness? posted at AltNoise.net.

Forgiveness is such an important skill.. for what it is worth I believe when we talk about forgiveness we are talking about re-connecting with a feeling of loving kindness for the person who is the subject of forgiveness. And perhaps it is helpful to recognize that loving kindness is a process, one that begins with non-harming/lack of ill-will, graduates to kindness and warmth, and blossoms into compassion (being a willingness to replace oneself with the other, and bear their hardships instead..)
When we are talking about forgiveness, we do not have to go all the way over to compassion to have re-connected to the kindness in our hearts.. we just have to overcome the feeling of ill-will/wishing the person harm.. once we have connected with not wishing the person ill, through time and patience, kindness and compassion with eventually grow.

Just my humble opinion. (Now Stephan will have to forgive me for hijacking his contribution..)

Well.. that’s the carnival for this week. Thanks all for your contributions.. please surf around and have a look at the carnies blogs, and leave a comment or two if you have an opinion or a comment.. even just to say thanks.. everyone loves to get comments!

Looking forward to next week when the carnival will be arriving on the doorstep of the about.com healing page.. should be a good one with the pros at the wheel!

We are lucky enough to be hosting the weekly Carnival of Healing here again at Reiki Blogger next week. I would like to extend a warm invitation to all the Reiki Blogger faithful to submit a post for the carnival. We always get lots of interesting articles from healing blogs around the net, but it is always great to get one from your own readers. Anything healing related would be okay, you can either email me the hyper link to your blog or post in comments here.. the carnival will go up on Saturday, so send them before then..

And you might like to have a browse through the current carnival being hosted at Spiral Visions (which is Phyl’s blog.. the carnival’s curator from About.com and a very thoughtful and passionate blogger..)

I would especially like to welcome any contributions from lurking readers from Orac’s blog. Go on, be brave..

What makes a person a good parent? Let’s start there..

To me what makes a good parent is pretty simple. It is guided by one primary factor.

The single most powerful energy that determines whether we grow into good parents or good reiki people is our intention/motivation. Intention is energy, don’t mistake it. It is the atmosphere of our mind before we move into thought and action.

I think both in Reiki and as a parent, what characterizes us as “good” Reiki people is 2 things.. as far as intention is concerned.

First, I think “good” Reiki people (by the way.. I would probably never say “good”.. truth be told.. I would normally, I think, choose to use the word “helpful” or “constructive”.. or something like that.. but for arguments sake lets stick with “good”..) need to have an intention that embodies the 5 Reiki ideals. Kind of all squashed into one. This will always be unique to each person, but hold a similar flavor, among people that have deeply contemplated their wisdom.

Personally, I focus most on Kindness. And find the others flow easily from that base. (Plus, His Holiness Dalai Lama is my ultimate hero.. and he always states so simply and beautifully that his religion is just kindness..).

But, because I am a bit tough.. I think the other aspect that is needed is a wish to be a better reiki person. The wish to improve as a Reiki person.

As the saying goes a husband that thinks he is a good husband is not a good husband, and a husband who thinks he is not a good husband is.

Because the first husband is arrogant.

Now, I know this goes a little against our age of assertive empowerment.. but I think we can all understand this in a healthy way.. and see that if we are humble and balanced (energy wise) we do not even begin to think about whether we are “good”.. we have more inner security than that.

But, even more so, because I am tough, I would also say that actually improving is part of being a good parent and being a good reiki person. If you are really trying, you should see improvement. You should see some increase in mental clarity, inner security, happiness, kindness, perception.. something.. other wise you are either just happy with the wishing and wanting, or.. you are not practising correctly.

The great thing about reiki, though, is that you just need to do it. And you will improve.

I just wanted to post quickly to say that I will be back posting a couple of times a week from now.

Things have settled into a bit of a rythmn with the family (baby is doing great! very happy.. smiling lots.. oo-ing and ah-ing.. and all that good stuff!) and the new business has moved through the start-up phase and is doing really well.. still taking almost all of my time, 7 days a week, but I feel much more relaxed about it all now.. and like I can move my focus outward again more.

I would recommend subscribing to the feed as a good way to get notification of new posts.. if you are into that sort of thing.. other wise new posts should be up around about every other day.. but still, no promises!

Hope you are all well. And your reiki path is progressing.. as you would like it to.

Talk soon.

TC